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Are We Making Ourselves Lonelier Without Knowing It?
Published about 2 months ago • 4 min read
Hello Reader, We talk about self-improvement constantly. But what if all that focus on ourselves is actually making us lonelier? I was scrolling through LinkedIn this weekend (as we all do) and a post from Pete Bombaci made me pause. Pete is the founder of GenWell, an organization here in Canada whose mission to enhance social health is so closely aligned with my own work that I always pay attention when something from them comes up. And this one was worth paying attention to.
Pete wasn't writing about the usual culprits - the celebrity highlight reels or the curated "perfect life" posts we all recognize. He was pointing out something a little quieter. It's the way our algorithms constantly serve up self-improvement experts, telling us how to be healthier, more productive, more optimized - and how, somewhere along the way, we started believing we were supposed to figure all of it out on our own.
It's something I've been watching unfold in my own work for years now. And it's something I think we need to talk about more.
We Were Never Meant to Do This Alone
There's nothing wrong with wanting to grow. Wanting to become healthier, to learn, to evolve - that's natural. But here's the thing: that constant inward focus keeps us turned toward ourselves. And as it turns out, we were never meant to live that way. We were meant to live for, and with, each other.
I'd argue that the antidote to comparison isn't just stepping away from social media. It's shifting our focus outward entirely. When we stop asking, "How can I be better?" and start asking, "How can I show up for the people around me?"or "How can I be the kind of person who notices when others are struggling?" - that's when we actually start to feel whole. As individuals and as a society.
The Moments That Matter Most
In my workplace etiquette and leadership trainings, I spend a lot of time encouraging people to think outside of themselves - to truly consider others in their interactions. It sounds simple. But in practice, we let these moments slip by every single day. Let me paint a picture for you.
A colleague just lost their job. The news travels through your network - a LinkedIn post, a whisper in the hallway. Do you pause? Do you make a mental note to check in on that person next week - or does the moment simply scroll past you, the way everything else does?
Here's another one. Someone in your network posts that their spouse has been diagnosed with cancer. The post is raw. It's vulnerable. But what if you did something small? Not a generic "thinking of you" - but a real one. "How is your spouse managing right now? And how are YOU doing?" Two questions. Thirty seconds of your day. And to that person? It can feel like the entire world noticed them.
Or consider this: a coworker stumbles badly during a presentation in a team meeting. You can see it on their face - the embarrassment, the frustration, maybe even the shame. The meeting moves on. Everyone pretends it didn't happen. But what if you were the one who stayed behind? Who caught them in the hallway and said, "Hey - want to grab a coffee?"What if you simply asked, "How are you really doing?" Because sometimes, a stumble in a meeting is just a stumble. And sometimes, it's a sign that something much deeper is going on.
These aren't grand gestures. They're small, intentional moments of connection - and they matter more than we realize.
A Room Full of People Who Didn't Want to Leave
Last week, I hosted another one of our monthly Gen Z professionals meetups - and once again, no one wanted to leave. These gatherings are designed to give young professionals a safe space to be honest, vulnerable, and heard, and what unfolded was nothing short of inspiring. From goal-setting strategies to real conversations about purpose, burnout, and social health, this generation showed up with remarkable self-awareness and held space for each other beautifully. Read the full recap on my blog: When Gen Z Professionals Actually Want to Stay: Reflections from Our Latest Meetup
Excited About a Pilot Project: Bridging Generational Divides
Moments like that are exactly why I'm so invested in this work - and why I'm excited to tell you about something new. I'm currently piloting a training program called Bridging Generational Divides, a hands-on, half-day workshop designed to tackle the very real communication challenges and mismatched expectations that arise when multiple generations - Gen Z, Millennials, Gen X, and Boomers - work side by side.
What makes this program different is that it's built as a conversation, not a lecture, and it includes a creative DJ turntable experience where mixed-generational teams collaborate to build a music mix together - a powerful metaphor for how blending different perspectives doesn't just work, it creates something none of us could have built alone. If this sounds like something your organization could benefit from, I'd love to hear from you - reply to this email and let's talk.
Have You Heard the Latest Episode?
If you haven't tuned into the podcast lately, I think you'll love this one. What the Luddite Club Teaches Us About Standing Out at Work explores the Neo-Luddite movement, the power of intentional tech use, and a fascinating underground movement being led by some truly remarkable Gen Z professionals. It's one of my favourites. Give it a listen - I think it might just change the way you think about your relationship with technology.
If you're not already following along, I'd love to connect with you on Instagram and YouTube as well. Instagram is where I share tips, behind-the-scenes moments, and workplace etiquette inspiration in bite-sized doses. And on YouTube, we're diving deeper - with videos, shorts to cover the topics that matter most in today's workplaces. Come find me on both - I'd love to see you there.
Until next time - stay curious. Stay connected. And pay attention to the people around you. They need you more than you know.
Subscribe for tips on handling workplace challenges, building communication and social skills, and exclusive course updates. Hear success stories from professionals, perfect for young professionals and leaders aiming to sharpen their skills and foster respect.
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