Hello Reader, I remember having a close colleague who was fine one day, and then had to go on sudden medical leave the next. We were exceptionally close, and I found it very hard not to inquire after her, to text her, to check in, to just know she was okay. But it was very clear she wanted no contact with anyone in the office while she was on leave. When she returned, it took everything in me not to reach out and ask. I sincerely was worried for her. If we weren't at work, I would have called...
7 days ago • 3 min read
Hello Reader, Last week's email on difficult people at work got way more replies than usual, so I wanted to come back to it - this time with a relationship that's trickier than a coworker or a boss, because you can't just document your way out of it or wait for HR to step in. The difficult client. This is a very common call I get from leaders - what do you do when it's not a coworker being difficult, it's the client? HR can't easily step in, because the person causing the problem isn't...
14 days ago • 2 min read
Hello Reader, I've been knee-deep in research for a training on workplace civility I'm building for a client, and somewhere around the fortieth story of a boss who wouldn't stop, a coworker who nitpicked everything and offered nothing, or a client whose on-the-verge-of-abusive behaviour went unaddressed, I noticed that incivility is really just what difficult people do, over and over - the same handful of moves, dressed up in different job titles. Just being near it is enough to tank your...
21 days ago • 3 min read
Hello Reader, A shorter note this week. Instead of my usual roundup, I wanted to tell you about a book I keep coming back to in my own training, and one of the most fruitful podcast conversations I've had in a while. I learned so much about Chinese Canadian history! The Book I Can't Stop Recommending If you haven't read The Charisma Myth by Olivia Fox Cabane, add it to your list. Her central argument is one I lean on constantly in my own work: charisma isn't something you're born with. It's a...
28 days ago • 2 min read
Hello Reader, Right now, my calendar reads like a strange cross-section of the economy. One day I'm with a non-profit helping people back into the workforce. The next, a bank and an insurance company. Then an entertainment company, a PR agency, a post-secondary institution, a municipal government, a premium retirement residence, and an industry association representing an entire profession. All in the same month. On paper, these clients have almost nothing in common. Different sectors,...
about 1 month ago • 3 min read
Hello Reader, An executive I've been working with told me something recently: she keeps putting in the effort to build connection with people at the office, and it's not being reciprocated. She's starting to lose motivation, reading the silence as "what's wrong with me?" Some would say professional relationships should just be left at the office. But we work with humans, and right now, we're lonelier than we've ever been. When she includes a teammate, she's really saying: "I see you. I...
about 1 month ago • 4 min read
Hello Reader, A lot has been happening in my world lately - a new corporate program in the works, Season 2 of Boosted has officially launched, and our Gen Z meetup series is back for another round. Here's what's inside. Have you ever been presenting something to someone - or even just having a conversation - and you can tell, instantly, that they're not really listening? I think we've all been on both sides of that. I know I have. Someone walks into my office while I'm deep in something, and...
about 2 months ago • 2 min read
Hello Reader, In one of my recent workshops on networking strategically, someone in the room shared something that's stuck with me. He'd referred a colleague to a contact of his months earlier, confident it would be a great fit. He never heard whether the meeting even happened, until he ran into that contact at another event and asked, almost as an afterthought, "oh, by the way, how did that go?" He wasn't upset about it. Just a little surprised by how easily it had slipped through the...
about 2 months ago • 4 min read
Hello Reader, A while back, I had a particularly stressful week, and I was shorter with a team member than I normally would be. I knew it the moment it happened. She knew it. Everyone else in the room knew it, too - it was out of character for me. So I apologized. Sort of. What I actually said was: "I'm sorry I snapped, but I was getting hit from every direction that week." That "but" undid almost everything before it. Looking back, I wasn't trying to excuse what I'd done. I think I just...
2 months ago • 3 min read